Introspection Inspection
In the finance race, every checkpoint is a test of penmanship
Know thyself. Know thy Ducktsack
Today’s Duckstack is again late, due to a rapid change in life circumstances. Non-tragic this time.
In times of ancient past a golem was created out of ducks, and the word for “life” inscribed on its forehead in duckish1. This brought the golem to life, a hulking and unnatural lurching mass, of ducks, and metal. You are that golem2. What will you do with this knowledge? Will you wander the earth looking for love? Go on a destructive rampage through Tokyo3? This might be philosophical but, there’s no right answer. If you wanted to mope in your basement about it, a lonely construct longing for contrast, what could anyone really do about it? Probably nothing, especially if you holed up with a lot of guns. But is that what you really want? Seems more likely to compound the problem, doesn't it. But I don't think anyone would judge you for it. After all, you’re one of a kind. And they don't know what it's like. What its like, to be a duckstack.
Christunlike
that’s not very christunlike of you. but like, in a good way
We all know and love the sermon on the mount, where Jesus says among other things, “🐝 kind4” or something5. So we all have to be Christlike by never being confrontational. But later Christ drives animals with a whip and throws a bunch of booths out of the temple presumably without a warrant. And we’re all supposed to be Christlike by not doing that.
There might be reasons that this line of thinking is justified- For example, I think the argument “Christ said with his mouth to be meek, but he did not say to overturn moneychangers, so its not a commandment” is perfectly valid. Call it the Simon Says rule. But you have to be prepared to apply it evenly- you have to be willing to rule out a lot of things Christ did that were good but did not say to do, and vice versa. But in practice this isn’t how people argue this, in my experience. I’ve had this argument about 10 times and nobody has pulled that one, anyway. Instead, they argue like this:
“Well, you’re not Christ.” Its not just the moneychangers of course- Christ called Pharisees lots of mean names, so the same argument applies, “be nice!” “Christ used insults and was not nice.” “Well you’re not Christ.” it goes around and around. “Okay but Christ isn’t the only person like this. Elijah Peter John Paul Jeremiah Moses and Isaiah were all quite insulting in their time.” “Well you’re not them.” Who am I then? I’m bobdaduck. You’re claiming to be an arbiter for God on how I comport myself, so by what authority do you say that bobdaduck shouldn’t use insults?” This is usually when they stop responding.
I’m not arguing for insulting people, of course. Not exactly. The civility-ites6 here have an inkling of a correct principle that they’re not quite able to identify here, in my opinion, which is discernment. Christ could insult people because he could see their hearts, and you can’t. That’s the real accusation. But I think they’re reluctant to make that explicit because it means that if I can demonstrate that I do know someone’s heart, then I’m justified not being civil, which isn’t the outcome they’re after. Makes sense to me.
I’m happy to contend that rather than no man knowing anybody’s hearts, every man knows everyone’s hearts. Its more of a spectrum, where you’re 70% right about a person, or 90%, or 40%7. Even when that number is low, should we condemn ourselves to inaction? I don't think so. Nor can I think of any scripture that says the righteousness of an action is dependent on how accurate your assessment of things turns out to be.
That said, should we sin that grace may abound? No. We will be judged on how much we *try* to be accurate in our assessments of things. That's a huge part of meekness. What I care about is “inaction through perfectionism” which is the vector conflict avoidance is disguising itself as in this particular instance. Idealism only justifies inaction when you intend to achieve the ideal- The conflict avoidant do not plan to start calling people vipers and mongrels and washed out toilets (IMO these are some of the more tame examples) once they achieve perfect discernment, they intend to just use the logic to convince someone else to do what they want, which is not what the scriptures are for.
There are a few Christian doctrines and heresies (depending on who you talk to) that should block this whole line of thinking, but don’t because adherents do not take them very seriously. This would be deification for sects like Catholics and The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, where (you might quibble on the meaning) men are built to become gods. If you’re going to be God, “only god can do that” doesn’t even really make sense. And for protestant sects like Baptists, they have a “priesthood of all the believers” where it is thought that everyone has equal authority to interpret the Bible and so forth. If everyone’s got the authority, then there’s no reason you shouldn’t be “authorized” to insult someone like Jesus would. Or exhibit the many other behaviors that Jesus demonstrated. Why isn’t the argument ever “only Jesus can stop someone from hacking people’s ears off with a sword”?
I’ve had God come and personally stop me from posting things before, it does happen if you’re listening, but it happens less often than I would expect. Not that I am perfectly in tune but you know, personal righteousness requires personal revelation. So if you’re going to criticize anything, its always made more sense to me to criticize someone’s discernment than to criticize their tone. This is also more honest because then you’re on an even playing field- they’re passing judgement on their discernment, and you’re passing judgement on them based on yours. Keeps you humble. Brigham Young had more thoughts on this subject than perhaps any other, possibly because polygamy just ended up with a lot of small community gossip stuff that needed to be regulated, but in any case he was quite wise.
You may, figuratively speaking, pound one Elder over the head with a club, and he does not know but what you have handed him a straw dipped in molasses to suck. There are others, if you speak a word to them, or take a straw and chasten them, whose hearts are broken; they are as tender in their feelings as an infant, and will melt like wax before the flame. You must not chasten them severely; you must chasten according to the spirit that is in the person. Some you may talk to all day long, and they do not know what you are talking about. There is a great variety. Treat people as they are
-Brigham Young,
What I’m after is good society, and good society is built on trying to be Christlike- not just in agreeableness8.
HIstory
No news is good news
In spite of all projections, Jethro’s health actually improved this week, slightly. We figured out some first steps to deal with an extremely major ear infection, and he’s started eating and drinking and going to the bathroom again. He currently cannot walk or hear, but he’s mostly in high spirits.
We also welcome a new guest writer to the history section of The Duckstack: The Infant
She can’t type on the keyboard very well yet, so I will do my best to report on her gestures and interactions in a sort of “interpretive dance” sense. Jethro got to meet his baby sister, which took a lot of small and large miracles. His failing health keeps him from being as attentive to her as I’m sure he’d like to be, but they are still very cute together. And the toddler has not even performed a diving elbow drop on her yet.
Jethro was petting the baby’s head in his lap and said “we should put a stuffed animal with her.” I think I even caught him saying “She likes me!”. Someone brought by a present for us (a baby blanket) and Jethro was like “I want to give it to her!” And I told him (in sign language) that she was asleep and he said “I want to put it next to her, so she can open it when she wakes up!” she’s like a day old
In other news, we had a moment of Jethro flinging himself into mamas arms: “Goo Goo!” (because he’s her baby)
“Papa, I don't know how my shoes end up in the car. …Magic? Its magic I think.”
We put on sonic the hedgehog for Jethro and left the room. We come back in a half hour and he’s got this huge grin on his face and says to the TV “That’s one fast hedgehog!”
Jethro finally felt good enough to do things again. “I have an idea. Lets go to macys and walmart and walgreens and dollar tree and mcdonalds and to go get donuts.” I can only assume he’s thinking “all at once.”
The toddler has been sick and sleeping lots, but he’s better today so he’s been screaming and jumping off the couches again which is I think his baseline state so that’s good.
Duckstack Jobs
Days since workplace accident: 0
The economy is getting rough and I know some of you are strapped for cash9 and for anyone with bright young eyes and a desire to make a difference in the world, We have several new job openings. You can apply to as many as you want, and if you are selected to move forward in the hiring process, we will let you know, by simply dropping you directly in the role you have applied for.
Snake Re-venomer. The snakes on the reservation have been biting too many hikers and have been running out of venom, which poses a grave risk to our hospitalization and antivenom sales quotas. If you would like to be a chaser, you can apply for advancement once you have earned merits in the role. Snakes are notoriously difficult to venomize, so for this position you will need to be able to lift 50 pounds above your head, have at least a masters degree in venom resistance OR equivalent experience in a charismatic or Pentecostal church. Work will entail popping off the snakes teeth and filling them back up with venom from our in-house venom faucet dispenser solution which we bought from a traveling salesman a few years back10.
The guy who gets tied to railroad tracks. This role is open for either gender as long as you are comfortable laying on your back for 8 hours a day and can speak fluent western. Candidates will be evaluated on how they look in a cowboy hat. Job perks: Excellent coworkers, paid leave from your normal life, and the ability to work up close and personal with Americas finest steam locomotives.
The guy who is hideously mutated into a zombie monster by radioactive toxic waste and/or other zombies. You will be required to fight heroes and probably be killed by them, so the base pay is very high. Paychecks every two weeks. Must pass a drug screening. Fulfilling work! Come join a family of devoted employees who dedicate themselves to a singular cause. Full dental/medical and 401k match
DUCKSNAX
Garden
I had to do this one at home on quarter size paper because I wasn’t near post-it notes11 in office this week
######EXPERIMENTAL FEATURE BE CAREFUL#######
A cousin language to Elvish, which is derived from Duckish, which is identical to just regular duck noises.
Congratulations!
Personally I don’t see what’s so appealing about tokyo but monsters rarely rampage anywhere else so I wouldn’t want to imply you’re sub-par
the emoji part he probably did with like, shadow puppets
The others were probably “🐝 yourself” and “🐝 strong & of good courage”
they have marked themselves
No other options
Really unclear where Jesus would score on the Big 5 but when I read the scriptures I do not read him as this maximally agreeable person
We can’t pay you, of course.
it costs us $60B per year in subscription fees
Post-it notes are a registered trademark of whoever they belong to, not the Duckstack, and The Duckstack does not own the concept of Post-It notes or wish to imply Post-It notes are in any way affiliated with or endorse The Duckstack, although they should.